1. I started swearing again.
And I felt.so.much.better. Who knew?
I'm kidding mom! Don't have a heart attack, there. On the contrary, I believe I've largely kicked my truck driver's mouth habit (oh crap please don't jinx myself).
Well. . . . except for that one time when I gave the garage wall a love tap with our van. But that does not count, people. Oh crap I hope Jeff doesn't read this post. . .
Okay so, really.
1. Be advised that bathtime is hellacious (that doesn't count either!) chaos.
It might be fun for those wise guys but it ain't fun for me. Fights, splashes, peeing in the tub-- you name it. I choose highly strategic bathing hours, now.
2. Be advised that the smartest thing I ever did was put a lock on the pantry door.
And it's real high.
3. And the smartest thing I ever did was put a lock on the door to the garage.
4. And a lock on the door to outside.
(yep. real high)
5. And a lock on the door to the basement.
(not gonna say it again)
6. Be aware that 5:00 pm and on turns kids into freakish, crazy, running, screaming monsters.
Extra patience, control, and good threats at this hour are needed.
7. There are now afternoon hot chocolate moments. Just me, a hot mug, and maybe a little sprinkle of caramel flavoring for kicks and giggles.
8. There is now, always, Exercise.
Exercise the Demons! (thick southern accent)
Exercising every morning is really kicking the morning off right. And boy, does it.
Oh wait- that's not me. Well, I do wear that every morning so close enough.
9. Be aware that while exercising, expect the downstairs to appear as so:
If it looks better than that, we-he-hell, score one for you.
10. Be advised that cooking with children is a hair-pulling, turn-your-back-and-scream-with-your-mouth-closed, experience.
(psst still a very very small window of time for an awesome wall art chalkboard here)