Monday, December 10, 2012

This Mom Crap Is A Punch To The Face.

Mind if I share a story?  I feel like oversharing today.
 
Aw. . . thanks, you're very kind.
 
This is a story about my oldest child. 
 
 
I'm gonna try not to be a big huge baby, but it's not looking good so far.  The throat lump is already in place.
 
I had Parent Teacher Conferences last week.  I never take my kids, so I can talk about them behind their backs.  That's the kind of mother I am.
 
After going over the standard academic issues, I asked the question that was really on my mind:
 
"So, um. . .how's he doing with friends?  See, every school year, somehow, as time goes on, it starts with a complaint about how he has no one to play with on the playground.  Then it becomes anxiety, and then, finally, it becomes a big problem.  Big enough for him to finally dread and avoid school."
 
And while I explain this, I make every effort to talk super matter of factly, like I mentioned that he likes to draw, or something, when in reality I'm trying reaaallly hard not to make that ugly cry face I make when I get upset.  Because it's ultra freaky.
 
 
(At this point, the tears welling up are probably giving me away.)
 
His teacher explains that no, she hasn't noticed this problem, but she will be sure to watch him and do what she can to help him (and me).  And I believe her because she is an awesome teacher, and I'm totally aware that this is going above and beyond for a teacher, because, hello, she has 23 other students.
 
So, I thank her profusely, and move on to my next appointment for my other, not-as-well-behaved child.
 
Well--
 
when I walk away from his teacher, she begins to grade papers in between appointments.  Very first paper she picks up is a letter to Santa from another little boy in class.  And the letter goes like this:
 
Dear Santa,
 
All I want for Christmas is a friend.
 
Love,
Michael
 
Okay.  Pull my heart out and crush it with a hammer, here.
 
So, you know how smart this teacher is, don't you?  I don't even have to say it. 
 
She takes my son aside, and lets him know that Michael needs a friend.  'S all he wants for Christmas.  Can you help?  And so on, and so forth.
 
Problem solved.  Two birds with one stone.  And I have now turned to mush.  Thanks for listening.

27 comments:

Debbie Gisle said...

As have I (tuned to mush, that is)...What a very Merry Christmas for them both. Dang Mommy-motions. I hate um. I do. That's beyond precious. Ugh. I'm suppose to be working. Thanks for making it obvious I'm not. :D

Lisa @ Shine Your Light said...

Motherhood, who knew how much it would wreck your heart and fill it up all at the same time? How awesome is that teacher? So glad your boy has her. Being a kid is so tricky sometimes.

CaressaRenae said...

I'm dealing with that right now with my kindergartner (and oldest). He's such A GREAT, AMAZING, WONDERFUL, KIND, FUNNY, SWEET, OMGILOVEHIMSOMUCH kid, but we send him to private school and we're on scholarship and as much as it shouldn't already be obvious, IT IS. And he's small for his age, so they think he's younger, automatically. He has to fight for everything and my boy? He's a lover. He said not having friends makes him feel lonely and sad. He's not even 6 yet. IT KILLS ME. All I want for Christmas is a friend for my kiddo. My amazing kiddo.

WhettenWild said...

I may or may not have cried just as much hearing that story for the SECOND time. Sad kids will break my heart everytime!

I Am Momma - Hear Me Roar said...

What a sweet story. Thanks for giving me a smile (and a tear) this morning.

Cheri

Kathy @ Creative Home Expressions said...

OMG, Mandi, I'm crying here! Thank God I swallowed that last bite of tuna fish sandwich. If that wasn't something meant to be, I don't know what is. I think as adults we are so absorbed in our "tough" lives that we forget just how tough it is to be a kid. That's a great story any time, but especially at Christmas.

frances said...

aww great story...glad they have found each other and cheers to a great teacher to recognize it. Frances

Little Oak Creations said...

What a beautiful story... I am so happy your little guy has found a friend, and "Santa" granted his little friend's wish early. :)

Dharma said...

Having struggled first hand for most of my 16 year old's life with this, I can offer the following: They do find "the one", it might not be until Grade 6 (as in my dude's case) but they find one another. Friends is a minefield for most kids, especially those kids who are sensitive and have kind souls. It happens for each of them I think eventually. I know where you are....and I probably teared up after reading this. I wish my son had a teacher like yours in his tinier days....it would have reduced a lot of my (and his) anxiety. Thanks for sharing :) Off to find Kleenex.

Kassi Mortensen said...

That does sound like a great teacher! So glad your son and Michael found a friend in each other.

Bethany @ A Fish Who Likes Flowers said...

It sounds like your son has one smart teacher! Good for her! I hope your son has fun with his new friend

Sue@House Pretty said...

I can relate! Rehave an only child, but not by choice. God blessed us with but one. And, I was running myself ragged taking her plaes so she would make friends. But she never saw he same kinds often enough to make any bonds. And she desperately wanted a friend. I homeschooled her for pre K. She wanted to give "big school" a try, and has made 4 or 5 friends so far. Still trying to figure out the best course of actin for next year, because I gave her a far better education than the public school could give her. I would be tempted to go for a private Christian school...if homeschooling would leave her too isolated...

Kimbo West said...

what a sweet story! teachers deserve so much more than they get...

Unknown said...

IM crying thanks!! :)

Cathy said...

First let me say,I'm not a hugely 'religious' person but I do believe in a wonderful, loving God and I think he may have snuck that paper to the top of the pile :) Great story, thanks for sharing.

Kelly Marie McKee said...

THANK YOU for sharing this story. It's a wonderful reminder of what the season and life is about.

Alicia said...

I am teary mush now. Sounds like a great teacher!

Shelley D. Hartman said...

Awesome story! I can totally relate too.

Jen said...

I have a huge lump in my throat and my vision is suddenly blurry. I think I'm coming down with something. Crap, now my eyes are watering really bad. I think I have to go now. Bye.

SueAnn Lommler said...

Lump is now in my throat as well, How sweet is that?
Merry Christmas
Hugs
SueAnn

Erin said...

Thanks for making me cry on a Tuesday morning, at work. And no, it's not the pregnancy hormones. That is just the most heart wrenching, yet sweetest thing I have read lately. And my son has the same problem. I hope your son and Michael find a true friendship.

julie - eab designs said...

Tears rolling down my cheeks! I hope they become the best of buddies!

Libby said...

What a wonderful moment in mommyhood...wish all the Michaels have teachers like her who have sons like yours to draw from. Sometimes they just have to be introduced.

a button I saw on a Bay City Roller & I love it: "strangers are only friends I haven't met"

I was told when my kids were your's ages: "Kids are either a pain in the neck or a lump in the throat". Still are as adults.

Evelyn said...

Aw, thanks a lot...now I'm crying. That is awesome. I am so happy for both boys!!!

Spencer & Lorilyn Crum said...

Crap I'm crying now.

Emily said...

So cute! What an awesome teacher!

Carrie said...

Too many of us mamas experience the same kind of challenge and worry over our kiddos. It often seems to be that the more intelligent and sensitive a child is the harder the friend thing can be for them. So glad God used a Santa letter and teacher to bring two boys together in friendship! Merry Christmas.