Sunday, May 22, 2011

I Soiled My Plants.

We're bona fide farmers now.

Yep. Bona-fide.

Our little 12x18 garden makes us so.

See, I soiled my plants these last couple weeks.

Even did strawberries when I was told it was too late in the season.

I'm a loner, a rebel. I live on the edge.

So do ya wanna know all I planted? Do ya, do ya?

Nah. You don't.

And dudes, I am seriously watching over my little garden like a mother hen to her chicks.

I'm so afraid I'll murder everything in it. (And dang you to the teenager who tossed their slurpee in there last week! Dang you to heck!)

Sorry. As I was saying, I'm watching over my little garden closely.

Take my watermelon plant for instance. Within 24 hours of planting:

BAM. Homicide. What was it?? What did I do? Was it my manure? My cedar? It's my hips, isn't it?

On a brighter note, everything else is hanging in there. Despite cold temps and mother nature's attempt to drown us all.

And many thanks to ye who suggested wave petunias for my urn.

They're purty. Me likey.

And I've got a lil garden box just for my hhhhherbs. They seem to be doing okay. So far. Knock on cedar.
So, um, how will I know when they're, like, edible and stuff?

And don't knock my train wreck of garden markers! Or, as the mister says, "Those are huge and you can't even read them."

You know where you can put that pitchfork, don't ya Jeffro?


lauren @ West Furniture Revival said...

your too funny with that title i had to read the post. love the picture and i love the garden.. looks great. good luck

Tracy's Trinkets and Treasures/Treasured Moments said...

I had a really great long comment and blogger ate it. I can't wait to watch the garden grow on your blog.

Layne Bushell said...

You never ever ever cease to make me laught out loud, hysterically, in the middle of the night. I wish I could have your sense of humor and your amazing comedic sense of timing...Love the garden. Still Laughing.

slommler said...

Ha! Ha! tell him!! Back off buddy...she has a real garden now and her pitchfork has been recently sharpened!!
Sorry about your watermelon. I feel your loss!!

Shirley said...

Okay, I just wanna know where ya got that blouse? Does not fit your bright and sparkly personality, no way! I planted watermelon a couple of years ago. I was so proud when they started growing little melons, totally relate to the mother hen picture. They got to about the size of a honeydew, then they developed rot. :( So we never got to try my homegrowns. On the herb side, I grew my own lettuce that same year, and basically started using it at the "baby" stage, cause I buy baby lettuce in the store, you know? Just don't give it a bad haircut the first day cause you're so excited to be getting you own stuff!!! :)

Suesan said...

If you bought the watermelon as a seedling, many places will refund your money or give you a replacement. Wouldn't hurt to call and ask. Your garden looks great. Thanks for the laugh this morning.

Kimbo West @ a girl and a glue gun said...

please blow up that first picture and hang it on the wall...pretty please!

WhettenWild said...

I happen to like the garden markers. hmpf!

Love LOVE the farmer picture. Jackson said "WHAT is Aunt Mandi doing?" ha ha.

Emily said...

Your garden looks awesome! I like the markers. That is such a cute idea.

P.S. I love the picture of you and Jeff

Heidi@TheCraftMonkey said...

bahahaha love your farmer pic! too funny! Glad to see things springing up for you! I've got several squash, that huzby says aren't "ready" for picking yet....and my darn carrots, they have TONS of green top but aren't poppin up...and radishes...don't even get me started on the tons o' green leafys growing from my far i haven't killed anything yet! keeping my fingers crossed!

Renee said...

I wanna know where you got that shirt, I so want to borrow it! Ha! :)

Tomato cages are great for peas...they'll wrap their little vines around it & the cages are cheap. :)

I'm almost done with mine...good grief!

Jen said...

I frickin' LOVE the farmer picture!! I really need to learn how to photoshop. I'm just not a good self learner. Actually, I SUCK at it! I'm the type that has to be shown. Meister bought me PSE 7 like 3 years ago and I'm ashamed to say I've NEVER used it. OK, well I've tried.....but lost patience. Do you know of any good, easy to follow tutorials?

Your watermelon plant doesn't actually look dead to me. Just beaten and battered. Maybe from all this lovely rain and hail??? There might still be life in it. ;) I've grown watermelons without even trying before. The kidlets spit their seeds in my flower garden one year and I got 7 melons from it!!! Kinda cool.

gina3 said...

Where did you get what you're wearing and how funny you got him to pose too. Hilarious. We often call my hubs "jeffro" too and they wear the same shorts. Good luck on the garden. I think it's off to a good start although we'll say a little prayer on the passing of the watermelon plant.

amity said...

i know you don't know me but your blog is so refreshing. i get giddy when i see that you have posted!! i love your farmer picture!! it is awesome. way to get your husband to do that, mine would NEVER!! oh and i can totally read your garden markers.

Lisa said...

Forget the garden - that first picture of the farmers steals the show today!! Even a pitchfork?? Too funny. You're like Little House on the Prairie over there! Hope you wear that outfit when you're tilling the garden!!

Good luck keeping everything alive. I have faith in you.

BeingBrook said...

LOVE the pitchfork picture. LOL. You are so funny, love your blog. This was the most entertaining post I've ever read about gardening. The watermelon doesn't look a little depressed. Maybe when it's sunny he'll perk up.

Spencer & Lorilyn Crum said...

That picture is WAY too perfect for words.

And it's too late to plant strawberry's??? Shoot, I planted some last weekend.

I just tell myself nothing will grow anyway, so if something does, it's a wonderful surprise.

Teri said...

Yay! I can't wait to see how this progresses. I just put in a bunch of flowers and a couple of tomatoes. Here's to trying not to kill stuff! :)

~Shayna~ said...

I love your little garden!! I really love the fencing around it. Where on earth did you get it?? Not that I will be able to find the same here in OK but wow I want it!