Monday, November 23, 2009

Keeping Up Appearances.

This is a pictureless post. I apologize. This is a rant. I apologize.

Had a revelation yesterday.

I's in church. Relief Society to be exact. I picked Mckenna out of her carseat-- and thought three things simultaneously:

1. Oh my gosh, I missed a spot on my leg. I have a whole stripe of hair down my knee. Better cover it up with Mckenna's blanket.

2. Oh my gosh, removing the blanket shows that there's a huge spit up stain on her carseat. That. is. so. embarrassing.

3. Oh my gosh, where did Mckenna's hairbow go? What will everyone think?

Then I realized: do you care what people think? WHO CARES. (Yes I am yelling this in my head: WHO CARES!?). And so:

-I am me.
-I am totally goofy.
-You can find me in my jammies still at 10:00 am, having exercised, (maybe. hopefully), and all the kids in underwear/diapers still.
-I am the mom who has spit up stains all over the carpet. Some get cleaned up well, and some, well, don't.
-I am the lady who leaves a load of laundry in the dryer all weekend long.
-I am the gal who pulls on the same pair of jeans from yesterday because I am in a dang hurry to get a move on, and plus, no one saw me yesterday.
-I am a Twilight nerd.
-I am a nerd altogether.
-I play video games with my kids. And I like it.
-I sing and dance in the shower. I mentioned I was a nerd.
-I'm trying to come to grips that my stomach is an absolute mess and probably plastic surgery can't fix that. Also, apparently some bear came and clawed up my cheeks. The "other" cheeks.
-I am sensitive. I remember every.single.time someone has hurt my feelings about the way I mother. I am trying to let go of these things.
-I am a bad housekeeper. I try. I try hard. If you drop by, you will see a mess.
-I am a bad cook. I have about 10 things I cook, and I rock it. Everything else is hit and miss.

This is my post of NO FEAR (Trina & YONF! Thanks!). I'll just be me. You be you.

7 comments:

chris w said...

You rock.
I'd rather be like you than be one of those women that look perfect and end up with kids who won't talk to them when they're teenagers.
PS: I have so had that moment with the missed hair on the leg. I try to wear long skirts or really thick tights all winter. :)

WhettenWild said...

I can make you feel better about your stomach right now........try 5 c-sections and kidney surgery. It ain't pretty. Period.

I always have those same feelings when I have a new baby. Then this last time I thought to myself "This is my FIFTH baby. No one else in here has more kids than I do. So as far as they are concerned, I am an expert."

You are a great mom! Don't worry what other people think. Besides.....as far as they are concerned YOU are an expert=)

chris w said...

Ok - mine sounded horrible. I have friends who look perfect most of the time and are great people.

I just meant that I would rather create memorable moments with my kids than to have a perfectly clean house and not have those moments.

As for what other people think, I have learned that most people are so worried about what others are thinking about them that they don't notice anyting wrong with me. :)

You are fabulous and whoever has said anything rude to you about your parenting has some issues of their own. Most of us are too busy with our own struggles/self-doubt to be worrying about what someone else is doing. ...unless it's family - family always seems to be able to pick on each other for some reason. ;)

Trina said...

I love, love, love this post!! It's taken me years (YEARS) to realize that everybody is hiding the same flaws, more or less, and I still am surprised and relieved when someone else admits to having the same secret as me. Makes me wonder how much more secure we'd all feel if we let more of our weaknesses show?

BTW, your list of confessions makes me like you even more, and not just because I can identify with so many of them!

Renee said...

THIS is why I love your blog so much! It is refreshingly realistic & raw!!! :) I love it!

I'm sorry that others have been rude about your parenting...I know how hard that is. I'm sure your kids will have great memories of you playing with them...I'd rather have that then a perfect museum house!

dena4kids said...

I love it! Sing it sister I am with ya!!!! I think you are WONDERFUL because of all the things on your list! We are two peas in a pod! We have embrassed our nerdy-ness! On with life, and out of our way! Love ya!

Emily said...

I am all of those things too! I love this post!!