See the floating baby over there? It's on zero. ZERO.
See Mommy's big belly?
There's no more room in there, baby. Trust me. If my ribcage could talk it would tell you it's starting to split apart to make more room.
See Mommy's closet?
It only has maternity clothes in it. Maternity clothes that no longer fit. We're gonna have to resort to a Muumuu pretty soon, my dear.
See your brother?
He was over 9 pounds and he was early. Now I've heard girls can be smaller, but come on, now.
See your daddy? He took time off to help settle the house AND for your arrival. He has to go back to work at some point, love.
See the cradle grampa made?
It's waiting for you next to my side of the bed.
Alright fine it's still in the garage but can be so easily moved up to my side of the bed.
I'd love to continue this life of denial about labor/delivery/post partum, but it's time you gave me my body back. Plus, the family's waiting.